Quiet Time for Sinners
April 28th, 2022 • by Naomi Vacaro
It was early in the morning and I had already failed miserably.
As I walked to the kitchen to grab a cup of coffee, I bumped into my toddler who slipped on the tile and reinjured a sprained ankle that had been healing for two weeks. Flustered and dismayed, I gathered up his wailing frame and held him tight, mentally berating myself for not being more careful. As I held him, my husband (who was supposed to be on baby duty) appeared and asked me to change our son’s diaper so he could complete another task. Annoyance surged through me, and seconds later my husband and I were at odds, exchanging angry words and stomping around the living room as our toddler cried and cried.
I had only been awake for 15 minutes.
A little while later I sat down with the few free minutes I had left for Bible reading and prayer. I was seething. I was angry at myself for accidentally hurting my son, exasperated by the tension between me and my husband, and deeply discouraged that I had already fallen headlong into multiple sins.
There was nothing I wanted to do less than open my Bible. I wanted to stew instead. I wanted to let the perverse pleasure of self-pity wash over me. More than anything, I wanted to hide in shame. I felt like my sin had disqualified me from having a quiet time that day and that I had ruined my chances of a sweet communion with Jesus.
When I finally did unclench my jaw to pray, all I could gasp was “Lord, help me!”
Guilt-Based Quiet Time
I know I’m not the only one who’s experienced a morning like this.
Sin is unavoidable even for the best of us, and on certain mornings the spiritual warfare starts early. In those moments, when our brokenness is put on full display, the true motives behind our spiritual routines become apparent. Are we having a quiet time because we are “good Christians” or because we need God’s help? The answer to this question will dictate how our quiet time functions and whether we base this divine habit on God’s grace or on our own guilt.
“Are we having a quiet time because we are “good Christians” or because we need God’s help?”
For years I treated Bible reading and prayer like a duty I was required to perform. Daily devotions were what good Christians did. I believed my faithfulness to Christ could be measured by how consistently I had a quiet time. So, when my sin emerged or I neglected to do devotions, I felt too ashamed to approach God. Only after enough time had passed to prove my penitence would I pick up my Bible again. I would “start fresh” and see how long I could go before failure derailed me and ended my devotional streak.
This is the definition of a guilt-based quiet time.
As naturally prideful creatures, we love feeling as though we’ve earned something. We love being able to take credit, and this desire can easily sneak into our relationship with God. Reading our Bible and praying can become one of the ways we prove ourselves spiritually, or even how we earn a feeling of accomplishment for the rest of the day. The problem with this mindset though is that it leaves no room for failure. Guilt-based quiet time isn’t meant for sinners; it only works for those who are good enough to perform their duty.
Thankfully, Jesus didn’t come for those who are good enough.
He came for sick sinners like you and me, and that same grace applies to our daily quiet time.
A Rhythm of Relationship
When we become Christians, we are first and foremost entering a relationship.
Jesus doesn’t just legally save us from sin and death, he also enters into a covenant of kinship with us, adopting us into his family and occupying a place in our very soul. This means everything we do after becoming a Christian is shaped by a genuine connection to the person of Christ. Our decisions, relationships, burdens, pleasures, task lists, and schedules are no longer just ours, but are his too, and the extent to which we submit these areas to Christ’s tender care will be directly influenced by the closeness of our walk with Him.
This is why we have a quiet time.
“The purpose of a quiet time is not to perform a religious duty, but to enjoy a close relationship with Jesus. ”
The purpose of a quiet time is not to perform a religious duty, but to enjoy a close relationship with Jesus. Our desire is that he should become the sweetest, nearest, and dearest thing in our lives and that his grace would become the defining factor of our existence.
In the sacred moments of Bible reading and prayer, we allow the Holy Spirit to deepen our connection with Christ. Scripture becomes a way for us to listen to God’s heart and prayer becomes an intimate conversation where we pour our heart out to him. On this holy ground, Jesus becomes nearer, dearer, and sweeter to us than he was the day before, and every day we reflect Christ a little more clearly to the surrounding world.
The Open Door of Grace
When our quiet time becomes a rhythm of relationship rather than a religious ritual, we lift the burden of guilt off our shoulders and put on the light and easy yoke of Christ.
Suddenly, there is no personal failure that can keep us from communing with God. Our quiet time becomes the place where we bring our sin and reveal our brokenness to be mended. With grace as our foundation, we have the freedom to structure our quiet time in whatever way works best for our current season. With grace as our center, we have the comfort of knowing that even if we unwisely neglect our devotional time, God’s love for us does not diminish in the slightest. With grace as our rock, we can enter our Bible reading and prayer time expecting our souls to be strengthened and our relationship with Christ to be deepened, no matter what failures have already tainted our day.
The door to the throne room of grace is open. We just need to step inside.
Naomi Vacaro is first and foremost a wholehearted follower of Jesus. She grew up as a daughter to missionaries in Outer Mongolia and then moved to Florida at the age of 18 to pursue a college degree. After graduating with a degree in graphic design, she worked as a wedding photographer and soon after felt led to create a journal called the Quiet Time Companion, along with an online ministry that would help Christians develop a daily habit of seeking Jesus. She now spends her time running the Wholehearted community and being a stay-at-home mom. She and her husband live in Florida with their son. Naomi is the author of Quiet: Creating Grace-Based Rhythms for Spending Time with Jesus. Visit her online at wholeheartedquiettime.com.
MORE FROM JOURNEYWOMEN
IMPORTANT NOTE
Journeywomen articles are intended to serve as a springboard for continued study in the context of your local church. While we carefully select writers each week, articles shared on the Journeywomen website do not imply Journeywomen's endorsement of all writings and positions of the authors or any other resources mentioned.
